If he still likes me, why is he still online dating? 15 common reasons (and what to do about it)

You don’t have any doubt that he’s nonetheless into you.

The truth is, you’ve got a powerful feeling that issues are shifting in the precise path.

However then in the future, you test your courting app and lo and behold, he’s nonetheless very a lot lively. A pal even advised you they matched!

What’s going on?

On this article, I’ll let you know twelve doable explanation why he’s nonetheless on-line courting even when he nonetheless likes you, and what you are able to do about it.

1) He’s not but able to (re) commit.

If a person likes you, it means simply that—that he LIKES you.

It doesn’t robotically imply that he desires you in his life or that he’s able to decide to you.

This, in fact, applies to exes, too. Sure, even for those who’ve been collectively for a decade.

Possibly the 2 of you might be on a break and even when he nonetheless likes you, he’s having second ideas of getting again collectively.

It may very well be as a result of he thinks you’ll nonetheless encounter the identical sorts of issues and he’s unsure that’s what he desires in a relationship. It may very well be as a result of he’s frightened he’d damage you the second time.

Or for those who’re by no means been formally collectively, it’s doable he’s frightened that he has nothing a lot to give you.

There are a lot of explanation why a person will not be able to commit.

To determine this man, it’s important to know precisely why, so that you’ll know what steps to take.

The factor is…generally, males don’t even know why they aren’t able to commit. They merely know they aren’t. So you must know tips on how to not take it too personally.

2) He simply forgot to deactivate.

Earlier than you’ve got a change of coronary heart and go fully chilly on him, take into account the likelihood that it’s actually simply nothing—that the man merely forgot to deactivate his account!

It occurs to quite a lot of us.

We fall in love, we get severe…however we neglect to deactivate the courting apps as a result of we’re merely not anal about what apps to delete or carry on our telephones.

Should you had been on a break, then it’s fully comprehensible that he makes use of courting apps.

It’s doable that that one time you noticed him lively on the courting app, he’s simply logged in as a result of there’s a notification. Or he simply obtained bored.

In different phrases, it’s most likely no biggie and also you’re simply overreading it.

3) He’s curious for those who’re nonetheless lively, too!

You came upon he’s lively since you logged in your courting apps.

What’s humorous is that he’s most likely doing the identical factor, too—he’s checking you out for those who’re nonetheless lively! Mainly, he’s doing precisely the identical factor you’re doing to him proper now.

You retain seeing that he has his inexperienced dot however that’s presumably as a result of he’s monitoring you, too.

Should you’ve identified him for some time and also you’re positive he’s not a participant or he’s not likely into courting apps, then this might positively be the rationale why he’s nonetheless lively.

It could be humorous for those who ask him about it and he says “however you too!”

4) He’s managing his expectations.

So let’s say you’ve been on a break and he advised you he nonetheless likes you, otherwise you’ve been hanging out for a bit and you are feeling that issues are going rather well…

However then part of him thinks “What if it received’t prove properly”, and that’s why he’d preserve speaking to others on-line. It’s a “simply in case” transfer that’s normally executed by those that are afraid of rejection—normally insecure males who’ve been damage many instances earlier than.

Be compassionate. Attempt to not paint him as a participant immediately.

However on the similar time, don’t see it as a mirrored image of who you might be. Earlier than you begin questioning what’s improper with you, take a tough take a look at this man.

Based mostly on what about him, are you able to see indicators that he’s delicate, scared, or jaded? Did he ever let you know that he obtained damage badly up to now?

Then chances are high he’s not likely being a prick. It’s his solution to defend his coronary heart.

5) He’s hooked on the straightforward thrill of on-line courting.

Consider it like smoking or any form of dependancy. Some individuals discover it exhausting to give up on-line courting. And it’s straightforward to see why.

It’s enjoyable attending to know somebody and flirting with them by way of phrases. The whole lot continues to be thrilling and this offers you a sure rush akin to getting excessive on medication.

Possibly he’s a type of individuals who simply can’t give up, and that it’s develop into a part of him.

He may suppose it’s simply innocent, or that he simply can’t assist it. Both means, the purpose is that he’s most likely not in love with another person, he simply has a behavior that he finds troublesome to let go of.

6) He’s nonetheless on the lookout for that particular one thing.

If a person actually desires to commit, he’ll accomplish that with all his coronary heart. However first he must be satisfied that the connection is price committing to.

In a means, many males might be thought-about hopeless romantics. They could suppose that they should discover that particular somebody who fulfills each single factor on their guidelines.

However that’s not the way it works. As courting and relationship coach Clayton Max says, you may’t “persuade” man to wish to be with you.

As an alternative you want to bypass his thoughts and strike at his coronary heart. Make him really feel a way of pleasure when he’s with you. Get him infatuated.

And you may simply do that by studying his temper and understanding what phrases to textual content him.

If you wish to know the key to that, then you must watch Clayton Max’s fast video right here the place he reveals you tips on how to make a person infatuated with you.

It’s simpler than you most likely thought!.

Infatuation is triggered by a primal drive deep throughout the male mind. And though it sounds loopy, there are a mixture of phrases you may say to generate emotions of red-hot ardour for you.

To study precisely what these texts are, watch Clayton’s wonderful video now.

7) It’s no biggie for him.

So he’s at all times on the courting apps, however he doesn’t take on-line courting significantly.

For him, phrases are simply phrases and so long as he’s not holding one other lady’s hand or kissing one other lady’s lips, he’s not “dishonest” on you.

He sees nothing improper with it as a result of for him, it’s only one solution to join with individuals. He most likely has made new mates from these courting apps.

What’s essential to notice is that he’s not mendacity when he mentioned he likes you, it’s simply that you simply aren’t official but so he doesn’t see something improper with what he’s doing.

Particularly as a result of he sees courting apps as only a innocent pastime—one thing to do whereas he’s ready for his shift to finish or whereas he’s lining up for espresso.

8) He’s truly a participant.

If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck…it’s most likely a duck, proper?

This shouldn’t come as a shock.

A man who says he likes you however continues to be very lively in on-line courting might be a participant.

It doesn’t imply that he lied to your face when he mentioned he likes you. Sure, he (nonetheless) likes you…however he most likely likes 100 different ladies, too.

Possibly it’s not his fault. Possibly he’s only a confused soul who can’t make up his thoughts. Possibly that’s how he’s constructed, or possibly he simply actually doesn’t take courting significantly.

I do know it appears like loopy recommendation…however don’t lower him off out of your life simply but. Gamers are merely romantics which have develop into jaded. As soon as upon a time, they had been idealistic and constant, however obtained damage alongside the way in which of their quest for real love.

There are methods to make a participant select you for good. And I’ll reveal them later on this article.

9) He enjoys playful flirtation.

Maybe “participant” is just too sturdy a phrase.

Possibly he simply actually enjoys attending to know ladies and flirting with them a little bit bit. For some males, it’s a part of their nature.

To him, flirting is only a common a part of day-to-day interactions. And so long as he’s not hurting anybody and he’s not falling in love with any certainly one of them, he’s not doing something unhealthy or immoral.

It’s doable he’s actually blind that it may break your coronary heart.

However the advantage of these sorts is that they normally know when to cease…as a result of additionally they don’t take flirting significantly.

Nevertheless, if it bothers you to the core (which could be very a lot comprehensible if he advised you he likes you), then you must confront him about it and be sincere about what you’re feeling when he does it. You may’t bend an excessive amount of otherwise you’ll break.

10) He likes the sensation of getting many potentialities.

Some males aren’t actually on the market to do evil issues to ladies. Some identical to to be at liberty, no matter which means to them.

Possibly that they had a relationship the place they felt trapped, managed, and suffocated (possibly it was your relationship with them!). And due to this, they made a vow to themself to not be in the identical place once more.

Or possibly they fell in love so exhausting solely to finish up damage in the long run.

So he talks to different ladies even when he’s nonetheless in love with you. He doesn’t wish to really feel he’s “caught” with only one choice. He thinks it’s too dangerous.

He’s been there earlier than and he doesn’t wish to expertise being in chains once more.

11) He’s making an attempt to make you jealous.

He’s on courting apps to set off you.

He is aware of you’re the jealous sort. It might be the rationale the 2 of you broke up or didn’t develop into a pair.

So now he’s testing you earlier than he’d even take into account pursuing you significantly.

He’s taking an enormous threat but when jealousy was an enormous drawback to you again then, he’s prepared to take an enormous threat simply so he finds out for those who’ve modified.

He desires to see for those who’ve matured when one thing like this occurs. He desires to see for those who’re going to cope with it in a wholesome, constructive means…or lash out such as you used to do.

Should you don’t assault him for it, it could be the signal that he’s been ready for. He could be impressed by how mature you’ve develop into, making him wish to (re)decide to you.

12) He desires to know the way a lot you want him.

That is much like #8, besides he’s doing it to check how a lot you want him.

You see him being lively on courting apps exactly as a result of he desires you to. In spite of everything, he may simply go by a distinct identification if he doesn’t wish to be came upon.

The thought is that for those who actually like him that a lot, then seeing him on courting websites will make you possessive and declare him for good. And for those who by no means appreciated him that a lot within the first place? You’d go away.

That is particularly doubtless if each of you might be too proud to take step one with out this type of incentive.

So as a substitute of strolling as much as you and asking you out, he’d quite set off you to make the primary transfer… even when it means he may lose you.

13) You’ve reached a plateau.

So let’s say the 2 of you might be getting alongside properly once more. However you didn’t discuss turning into a pair. You’ve reached a state the place you’re not simply mates however you’re not lovers both. And it’s been some time.

Nicely then, he most likely thinks that you simply’re not that into him, so he tries on-line courting once more. In spite of everything, for those who’re actually into him, you’d present some clear indicators. And possibly you weren’t giving him these.

In different phrases, he’s waited for thus lengthy for issues to maneuver ahead, however he’s gotten impatient…or bored…or he’s beginning to lose his curiosity in you. So he goes to the courting apps.

14) He desires to maneuver on.

He likes you. He actually does. However that isn’t sufficient to make him wish to come to your aspect.

There’s some emotional baggage that makes him wish to transfer on. Maybe you’re exes and your final relationship was disastrous for him.

Or maybe you had been by no means collectively, however certainly one of you has damage the opposite a lot that he would quite go away than to entertain a future with you.

His coronary heart wishes one factor —you— however his thoughts has deemed that it isn’t in his finest pursuits. So he tries to maneuver on… and the quickest means he can do that’s by seeing another person.

It’s typically mentioned that you simply by no means cease loving somebody. You merely discover somebody you’re keen on extra. He desires to seek out that somebody in order that he can lastly go away you behind.

15) He’s at all times on the seek for “the one”

Trendy-day courting is tough.

Sure, it’s straightforward to swipe proper and have small speak by way of courting apps, but it surely’s additionally exactly due to this that it’s exhausting. Individuals have now develop into extra involved about discovering that excellent somebody.

They’re by no means content material with simply an 85% match. What in the event that they settled for that, solely to discover a 99.9% match a number of days later?

Possibly your man is a type of individuals. So even for those who two are already good collectively, he would nonetheless wish to preserve courting on-line.

So what you wish to do is to make your self fully indispensable and irreplaceable.

Even for those who can’t develop into a 100% match for him, supply him one thing that he isn’t going to get from every other lady.

That is the way you get him so hooked that he’s by no means going to provide you up.

But when he nonetheless allows you to down and it simply isn’t going to work, then there’s nothing to it however to say goodbye and transfer on.

What to do

It may be unsettling and heartbreaking to seek out out that the person who expressed his curiosity in you continues to be courting on-line.

However this can be a regular a part of modern-day courting.

Listed below are some issues you are able to do for those who’re on this state of affairs.

Make him need you greater than something.

Lots of the largest explanation why he’s nonetheless courting others on-line is as a result of he isn’t absolutely bought on the thought of chasing after you… but.

So what you want to do is to make him need you above every part else.

What you want to do:

• Get on his degree by understanding and having fun with his pursuits along with him.
• Make him really feel heard and method him with an open thoughts.
• Don’t be pretend—at all times be your real self round him.
• Present him that you simply’re unbiased and self-sufficient.
• Don’t be too possessive or clingy and present him you respect his time.

Present him you’re able to commit.

You additionally want to indicate him that he’s not going to be losing his time in going after you—that you simply’re not going to go away him ready round whilst you make up your thoughts.

That is one thing which you can’t simply act out, in fact.

You truly do must be able to commit in case you are to attempt. He would simply see by way of you in any other case.

What you want to do:

• Be sure to have your life sorted out. You may’t preserve an excellent relationship for those who’re too busy to are inclined to him!
• Be open with him, and present that you simply’re not afraid to be intimate. Don’t discuss your exes.
• Be secure and reliable. Make him really feel like he can depend on you when he wants somebody to lean on.

Get steering from a relationship coach

Whereas this text explores the principle explanation why a man who likes you continues to be on-line courting, it may be useful to talk to a relationship coach about your state of affairs.

With an expert relationship coach, you will get recommendation particular to your life and your experiences…

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Nicely, I reached out to them a number of months in the past after I was going by way of a troublesome patch in my very own relationship. After being misplaced in my ideas for thus lengthy, they gave me a singular perception into the dynamics of my relationship and tips on how to get it again on monitor.

I used to be blown away by how type, empathetic, and genuinely useful my coach was.

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Have an sincere dialog.

Correct communication is essential in relationships, and it’s essential so that you can begin with it from the very starting.

So attempt to discover a time and place the place you may speak to him about your ideas and emotions, in addition to to plan your future.

For starters, you may wish to handle the next:

• How you’re feeling in the direction of each other.
• The explanation why he’s looking for a date on-line.
• What you’re feeling about him being actively courting on-line.
• What he’s prepared to do about it.
• Should you ought to attempt to date one another.

That is in no way exhaustive, in fact.

Contemplate it a normal listing you may regulate to fit your particular relationship along with him.

Deal with your self.

Positive, attempt to win him over…however it’s important to ask your self “Do I actually, actually, actually like this?” and “Is that this what love seems like?”

Should you really feel that sure, he certainly loves you (regardless of him nonetheless on-line courting) and also you’re positive that he’s the one you really need, go make it work. Do the required steps talked about above. Don’t be afraid to be the chaser. Simply ensure he’s price it.

Nevertheless, if in case you have doubts and also you’re not prepared to threat courting somebody who may cheat on you, then it could be higher so that you can transfer on.

Conclusion

It may be exhausting to see somebody you want being on the market on the lookout for a date, particularly when that he likes you again.

You can be affected by ideas like “what am I lacking? Am I not sufficient?”

Actually, more often than not it’s simply benign…or the issue isn’t you, however him.

However that doesn’t imply you’re powerless both.

With the precise phrases you may chain his coronary heart to yours and make him so obsessive about you that he’ll by no means take a look at anybody else.