22 no bullsh*t ways to make him fear losing you

We generally embody merchandise we predict are helpful for our readers. For those who purchase by way of hyperlinks on this web page, we might earn a small fee. Learn our affiliate disclosure.


Let’s face it: some guys can get cocky.

They suppose that since you’re married/in a relationship with them, they gained’t lose you.

They’re flawed.

And in case your companion hasn’t realized this but, then I like to recommend doing any (or a number of) of those 22 no-bullsh*t methods. Certainly, they’ll make him afraid of shedding you!

Let’s start.

1) Don’t be too out there

Do you at all times reply to your man’s each beck and name? Effectively, it’s your fixed availability that makes him suppose that he gained’t lose you – ever.

So if I had been you, don’t be too out there.

For instance, if he asks you to accompany him to do that or that, don’t ditch the plans you’ve made earlier than he requested you (on the final minute.)

You’re being too out there, too straightforward, as they are saying.

You might have a life earlier than you met him. Go forward and dwell it!

See, when you make him understand that your world solely doesn’t simply revolve round him, he’ll do the whole lot he can to be sure that he gained’t lose you.

2) Maintain him ready

I understand how we women wish to eagerly reply our companions’ texts/calls instantly. However for those who suppose that this does your relationship good, that’s the place you’re flawed.

Actually, it simply makes your man cocky. Because you always prioritize his texts and calls, he feels that he gained’t lose you – ever.

It’s similar to being too out there.

That’s why, in my very own humble opinion, I say let him wait.

As to how lengthy, etiquette professional Daniel Submit Senning gives this recommendation:

“For those who’ve dated somebody for a number of months or a yr, it is best to usually textual content one another again inside the hour that you simply see the message.”

3) Don’t present an excessive amount of curiosity in him

When a man is aware of you’re tremendous into him, he gained’t fear about shedding you.

Identical to clinginess, scientific sexologist Kelley Johnson, Ph.D. has defined that too “a lot consideration might be perceived as desperation or a scarcity of independence [on the part of the person showing interest]. It may imply that they’re a bit of extra codependent than you’d like them to be.”

That’s why it’s essential to scale your curiosity again, even for those who’re head over heels in love with him.

As an alternative of constructing googly-eyes each time he’s round, examine your cellphone or do one thing else. However I don’t imply pulling all the way in which again and appearing as for those who don’t care a bit about him. I’ve performed the latter in my previous relationship, and it broke us aside.

What I’m attempting to say right here is that it is best to try to indicate the correct amount of curiosity. Let him know that you simply like him, however not an excessive amount of. That’ll make him understand that he stands to lose you – even for those who’ve been collectively for all these years.

4) Don’t be too clingy

Males, typically, don’t like clingy companions. As one person has defined in a Reddit thread:

“I’ve hobbies, I’ve a job, and I simply must get me some “me time” right here and there… If she expects me to see her or discuss to her on the cellphone every single day, it’s simply not going to work.”

In different phrases, for those who’ve latched your self to him like a leech, he’ll be tremendous assured that you simply gained’t go away him.

Think about this: you may’t even let go of him proper now, so in his thoughts, what are the probabilities you’ll dump him for good?

That being stated, it is best to battle the urge to be clingy in order for you him to fret about shedding you. Actually, it is best to…

4) Be a powerful, impartial lady

For those who’re a clingy, super-interested woman who depends in your man rather a lot, then don’t be stunned if he’s not a bit involved about shedding you.

That’s why it’s necessary to be a powerful, impartial lady – even for those who’re in a relationship.

Take it from the male POV of author David Mendez:

“An impartial lady is robust and safe…

Somebody who’s their very own particular person is extra attention-grabbing. They interact and problem us in a large number of how.

Males get pleasure from this as a result of it retains us from shedding curiosity. Somebody who could make their very own choices makes and permits her companion to take action as properly, which makes for a way more fulfilling relationship.”

5) Set off his inside ‘hero’

Males prefer to really feel (and act) like heroes. So for those who haven’t managed to set off this ‘drive’ in him but, he’ll act as if he gained’t lose you.

You see, this ‘hero intuition’ is what actually drives males in relationships. Actually, it’s ingrained of their DNA, says relationship professional James Bauer.

That being stated, you don’t must play the damsel in misery simply to set off your man’s hero intuition.

All it’s essential to do is to take a look at James Bauer’s glorious free video right here. Right here, he shares some straightforward tricks to get you began, similar to sending him a 12-word textual content that can set off his hero intuition ASAP.

When you do that, your man will probably be deathly afraid of shedding you.

So if I had been you, don’t go doing issues that don’t work. As an alternative, click on right here to look at the free video that can show you how to set off your man’s hero intuition instantly.

6) Make plans the place he isn’t included (and push by way of with them)

Possibly your man is used to being included in all of your plans – even when they’re months/years forward sooner or later.

See, this is among the the reason why he isn’t afraid of shedding you.

So if you wish to make a change, then it’s time to make some future plans the place he isn’t included.

For instance, you can join an workplace journey – and go solo.

Effectively, not essentially solo – for you’ll be there along with your work mates for those who get my drift.

He’ll be questioning why you haven’t included him. Certain sufficient, he’ll be paranoid that a few of your workmates will come hit on you whereas he’s not there.

He’ll be so afraid to lose you that he could come to the journey uninvited!

7) Present that you simply’re having enjoyable with out him

Let’s say you’ve made plans with out him, and he’s nonetheless unafraid of shedding you. Effectively, the following factor it is best to do is present that you simply’re having enjoyable with out him.

Submit photos of the stuff you’ve performed in your journey. Rave about them. In different phrases, it’s essential to broadcast to the world that you can be completely happy with out him.

It will make him understand that the world is your oyster – and also you don’t essentially want him to have a great time.

He’ll absolutely do higher after this!

8) Be a bit of flirty to different guys

Your boyfriend in all probability thinks that you simply don’t have the heart to go away him. Effectively, by being a bit of flirty with the opposite guys, you’ll present him that you simply do!

As one poster commented in a Quora thread, males get jealous (and afraid you’ll dump them)  when “you’re flirting with another person.”

Additionally they get threatened after they see that “you’re emotionally extra intimate with another person otherwise you’re paying extra consideration to another person.”

In different phrases, sparking up some competitors at all times works. It’s truly one of many factors James Bauer makes in his video.

See, when a person feels helpful – and wanted – the fast tendency is for him to commit higher to his companion.

So if you wish to unlock this ‘intuition’ that’ll make your companion afraid of shedding you, then ensure that to look at this beneficial video by James Bauer.

9) Stay seductive

Among the finest methods to maintain your companion 100% is to stay seductive.

Which means carrying horny lingerie, regardless of how cozy it’s to only lounge in an outsized shirt and PJs!

You can too strive appearing out as strangers, or role-playing sure individuals to construct up anticipation.

Talking of being seductive, it additionally pays to…

10) Spice issues up!

The primary weeks/months within the bed room are positive to be crammed with sparks and butterflies. However for those who’ve been courting for fairly a while, then it will not be as ‘sizzling’ because it was once.

So if the intercourse continues to be ‘meh’ for him, he gained’t be that scared to lose you. Moreover, he may exit and search an journey with another person.

That’s why it’s essential to spice issues up!

Strive new positions. Do it in probably the most uncanny of locations. Use some ‘marital aids.’ The extra novel the expertise is, the higher.

By blowing his thoughts, he absolutely gained’t blow his possibilities with you!

11) Maintain the thriller

Though it’s good to be 100% open along with your companion, retaining an aura wouldn’t damage. If any, it’ll make your man extra concerned about you.

“We wish to know what we have no idea,” explains one Quora poster. “We prefer to think about that there’s extra to a different particular person than what we are able to see. When (or if) we discover out that there’s nothing extra to be came upon, we lose curiosity.”

I understand how laborious it’s to maintain some sense of thriller in a time when you may publish all of your knowledge on the world vast net. However if you wish to make your man fearful of shedding you, then strive to not broadcast all of your self for the world to see.

Maintain it slim, as they at all times say.

12) Act a bit of distant

Identical to being mysterious, appearing a bit distant will make a man fret about shedding you.

See, when “your companion feels you’re too needy, they take an emotional step again. This makes you’re feeling nervous, rejected, or deserted, and due to this fact needier.”

That’s why psychologist Man Winch, Ph.D. thinks it’s greatest to “take a (non permanent) step again your self and ‘want’ your companion a bit much less for per week.”

In different phrases, attempt to act a bit of distant infrequently.

By doing this, your man will probably be extra engaged, out there, and hell-bent on NOT shedding you.

13) Seek the advice of with a relationship professional

I understand how irritating it’s to have a person who thinks he wouldn’t lose you. That’s why I made a decision to talk with the specialists over at Relationship Hero when my relationship was on the rocks.

It’s a web site the place skilled relationship coaches assist {couples} embroiled in troublesome love conditions, similar to this one.

And the perfect half? You get to speak with variety and empathetic coaches, in contrast to the ‘chilly’ ones you’ll discover on comparable websites.

Connecting with these specialists is kind of straightforward, too. All you simply must do is click on right here. In only a matter of minutes, you’ll be in contact with a relationship coach who might help change your love life.

14) Give attention to you

If you would like your companion to worry shedding you, then it’s essential to concentrate on your self. It’s all about self-care, child!

Possibly you’ve been too centered on caring for him – or your youngsters. Possibly you’ve been too busy with work that you simply’ve forgotten to pamper your self.

So why ought to he be involved that you simply’ll go away while you’re caught up with a complete lot of different issues?

Principally, it’s one of many classes I discovered from my previous relationship. I let myself go, so he simply thought “why trouble?”

It was a wake-up name that made me concentrate on myself. I began figuring out and dolling myself up.

Though at first, it was for him, I continued it for myself.

Earlier than I knew it, he grew to become clingier than normal. He grew to become extra protecting to the purpose of following me in all places!

It was annoying at first, nevertheless it did make him afraid of shedding me!

15) Do what you wish to do

For those who carry on doing what your companion tells you to do, then he gained’t fear about shedding you. So in order for you him to construct a wholesome worry inside him, then begin doing what you wish to do as a substitute.

If he tells you to do A, however you want doing B, do B.

Bear in mind: don’t do that simply since you wish to antagonize him. Do it as a result of it’s what you need.

See, nothing will get a man extra fearful than realizing that his girlfriend/spouse is not the submissive lady that she was once.

When he realizes that you simply’ll do what you need – and that features the potential for leaving him for one more – he’ll attempt to be the companion you deserve.

16) Carry on pursuing your ambitions

As I’ve talked about earlier than, males love robust, impartial ladies. And nothing screams these extra while you carry on pursuing your ambitions.

See, when a man sees that you simply’ve given up in your goals, he’ll most certainly surrender on you as properly.

Certain, some guys don’t like women who do higher than them. However that’s only a handful. Likelihood is, your man likes you to be simply as profitable – if no more.
I imply, simply put your self in his sneakers. Would you retain on courting a man with no drive?

Let’s face it. We women love guys with ambition. And sure, the identical goes with males.

So go forward, pursue that high-paying job opening. Take that post-graduate diploma and get that Ph.D. Apply for that college scholarship overseas.

Bear in mind: when a man sees that you simply’re a high-quality woman, he’ll do the whole lot he can to maintain you within the fold.

17) Don’t let him deal with you as a second possibility

If you would like your man to be afraid of shedding you, then you definately shouldn’t let him deal with you as a second possibility.

If he asks you out on a date as a result of all his mates bailed out on him, don’t go.

See, that is just like the provision challenge I’ve talked about prior. For those who carry on letting him deal with you want a second possibility, then he would fail to comprehend your value.

You’re letting him stroll over you, in spite of everything.

To this, I say: stand your floor.

Inform him and make him really feel that you simply’re performed being the second possibility.

If he desires your relationship to proceed, then he ought to put you first. You’re entitled to be a high precedence in his life.

18) Cease nagging him

Let’s face it: we girls are likely to nag.

The fairer intercourse usually does this, explains specialists, “Largely as a result of they’re conditioned to really feel extra answerable for managing house and household life. They usually are typically extra delicate to early indicators of issues in a relationship.”

And it goes with out saying: nagging is “the kind of poisonous communication that may ultimately sink a relationship.”

Merely put, nagging will make your man care the least about shedding you. If any, it could truly prod him to go away you behind.

So if I had been you, you higher cease the nagging proper now. As an alternative, it is best to attempt to do these expert-backed ideas:

  • Restrict your ‘reminder’ to at least one phrase.
  • Recommend duties with out phrases.
  • Don’t insist that the duty be performed in response to your required schedule.
  • Don’t push for the unattainable!

19) Go someplace/journey alone

Touring alone comes with a number of advantages. For one, it should make your man (whether or not you’re official or not) understand what a gem you’re.

It exhibits that you simply’re robust. Unbiased even. And, as I’ve talked about above, guys like these qualities in a girl.

Persona-wise, it ‘forces you to develop.’ Explains Farah Chidiac of Ohio College:

“When you find yourself touring by yourself, it’s as much as you to make troublesome choices pertaining to any confronted challenges. That is finally and inevitably going that will help you develop as an individual.”

Moreover, it will probably show you how to replicate on the present state of your relationship.

Is he value courting – or preserving?

Since he’s not afraid of shedding you, do you have to simply proceed assembly different individuals, which you’ll ultimately obtain as you go gallivanting alone?

20) Don’t act like his girlfriend – for those who’re not

Some guys will attempt to skate previous the technicalities.

See, he’s not afraid to lose you since you’re giving him greater than he’s entitled to. If he can get the girlfriend expertise with out the label, then why ought to he exert extra effort?

That’s why you shouldn’t give him greater than he deserves. And, if he calls for it, then it’s time so that you can speak about labeling the connection.

As therapist Shena Tubbs explains in her interview:

“Labels must be placed on the connection from the start.  It’s so necessary to be clear from the start to keep away from any heartbreak, emotions of getting used or misled, and to guard the character of the connection.”

21) Don’t be afraid thus far round

Once more, if he’s not your boyfriend, then ensure that thus far round. I assure you, he’ll be clamoring to win you again as soon as he hears that you simply’re courting another person.

Extra so in case your new man is hotter, taller, or extra profitable than he’s.

That is what specialists name mate-retention habits. Because the identify suggests, it’s when a person does the whole lot he can to be sure that his companion is his – solely his.

So don’t be stunned when this man of yours begins to go with you extra and provide you with items, amongst many different issues. It’s benefit-provisioning mate-retention habits.

And, in response to specialists, it has the “impact of constructing their companion really feel extra happy with their present relationship, probably lowering the probability of infidelity or their companion leaving the connection utterly.”

Remaining ideas

It’s a identified indisputable fact that relationships might be downright irritating. Such is the case with a man who doesn’t worry shedding you.

For conditions like this, it’s greatest to get exterior assist.

And sure, I attempted it out myself!

I’ve been in your sneakers earlier than, that’s why I received in contact with Relationship Hero.

For me, it’s the perfect place to get tailored recommendation for all love-related conditions. The coaches right here have seen all of it, so that they know what helps and what doesn’t.

It’s as if I used to be speaking to a trusted buddy. My coach was empathetic and type, and he or she took the time to grasp my distinctive state of affairs.

Evidently, she gave me life-changing recommendation – one which ultimately resolved my relationship issues.

If you wish to ‘repair’ your love life – similar to I did – then I like to recommend connecting with an authorized relationship coach.

Click on right here to get in contact with one at this time.

Can a relationship coach show you how to too?

If you would like particular recommendation in your state of affairs, it may be very useful to talk to a relationship coach.

I do know this from private expertise…

A couple of months in the past, I reached out to Relationship Hero once I was going by way of a troublesome patch in my relationship. After being misplaced in my ideas for therefore lengthy, they gave me a singular perception into the dynamics of my relationship and the right way to get it again on monitor.

For those who haven’t heard of Relationship Hero earlier than, it’s a web site the place extremely skilled relationship coaches assist individuals by way of difficult and troublesome love conditions.

In just some minutes you may join with an authorized relationship coach and get tailored recommendation on your state of affairs.

I used to be blown away by how variety, empathetic, and genuinely useful my coach was.

Click on right here to get began.

  • Leave Comments